Tag Archives: health

An intention of a year of sobriety

I had my first drink of alcohol when I was 12, I got drunk for the first time when I was 15 years old and by the time I was 21, I was consistently blacking out. I have gained and lost many friends from my alcohol infused adventures. The ones that I have gained are okay, the ones that I have lost never understood my struggle and the ones that I still have I am thankful for.

Alcohol turns me into a completely different person. My first two drinks I am normally fine, the third I get giggly and by the fourth, I can’t remember shit and will usually end up buying shit I really don’t need. A year and a half ago I go drunk with some friends, I left the party blacked out drunk in an attempt to catch my flight to LAX. My lifelong friend “Z” came to the rescue and almost killed me. She did not speak to me for an entire year, the thought of losing someone that I had known since forever scares the living shit out of me. I want to change because the people that love me hate me when I drink. I hate myself when I drink. I hate being hungover, I hate the fact that I smoke cigarettes, I hate how I get super sick after drinking.

My current lifestyle does not allow me to drink often, but I feel as though it would bring me much pride to say I am sober. I know it will make feel happier and give me a sense of joy. Last year I went almost 4 months without drinking alcohol, I can do this.

Just do it. Change my life, if I lose people and relationships, fine, but I will know I am healthy and happy. I am confident that the  people I have lost relationships will understand me  bit more. The people that I surround myself with will be more caring, mindful and strong. It will give me an advantage to become more successful. I will have a clearer conscience, less anxiety and confidence. My frontal cortex will thank me.

So I am going to do it, one year at a time, one year of no alcohol.

2016 – The year of the Mokey

Every year I attempt to set my goals, I usually scribble it down in my journal and put it away until the following year. It is a gift to myself that I give each year after Christmas has ended. I take the time to reflect on where I was last year, what I envisioned my life to be, what I accomplished and what I aspire for the next year.

As a “millennial” I have been told that my generation is the generation to constantly change, pivot careers and overall to appear to be unreliable in the business world. I think were misunderstood. We are the generation that refuses to be miserable, were not going to work an 8-6 job for a salary that gets us nowhere and little promotion. Maybe I am speaking for an entire generation, or maybe I am speaking for myself. I am tired of sitting behind a desk tinkering on a computer all day, life is meant to be so much more than that. I know that working in a cubicle and wearing a suit was a childhood dream. I think it’s because my parents worked in the education system and I thought that if I wore a suit I would be rich. I have money, but my life is less than rich.

I want to leave all stones unturned in my life. I don’t want to say, “oh I have always wanted to do that”. I want to say, “oh, what a memory it was”. I want my work to embody my lifestyle. I am not a selfish person, I am not greedy or manipulative. If I spend 40 hours per week with others, I want the people I am surrounding myself with to have similar ideas and beliefs or at least, be open to learning new things. I have contemplated for hours about what I should do to achieve an authenticated life and 2016 is the year I am going to do it.

Goals:

  1. Apply to Naropa University’s graduate program
  2. Get an interview at Naropa University
  3. Get into Naropa University Graduate Program – Fall 2016
  4. Get my 200 Yoga Teacher Training Certification from Parusha Yoga
  5. Attain a job at either a. Career Center at Naropa with a scholarship, b. RiseSmart or Cielo
  6. Move to somewhere beautiful
    1. If I get into Naropa, then it will be Boulder.
    2. If not Tahoe, Mammoth, Boulder, someplace awesome where I can be outside.
  7. Strengthen my yoga practice
  8. Attain a deeper understanding of holistic medicine
    1. Spread the knowledge of it
  9. Recover my surgery knee to 100%
  10. Get back into skiing
  11. get back into skateboarding
  12. Get back into downhill biking
  13. Become more thankful – once a day write or reflect one good thing I am thankful for
  14. go camping
  15. go on a road trip
  16. Go raving with Knarly
  17. Continue to grow my relationship with my family
  18. Be open to finding love -Monkey year is my year for love ❤
  19. Attend Wonderlust with my Mother
  20. Attend a festival with my Sister
  21. Catch a fish
  22. Read at least 4 books
  23. Read at least 30 minutes per week night
  24. Do at least 6 Bikram double days
  25. Participate in 2 30 day Yoga Challenges
  26. Stay sober from Alcohol for 1 year
  27. 3 morning workouts per week
  28. LONG TERM
    1. Launch a company for spreading holistic medicine
    2. Own my own property
    3. Have a garden to grow my own tea
    4. Get married to a soulmate
    5. have children
    6. Travel to every continent
    7. See the Northern Lights
    8. Be happy.
    9. Spread positivity
    10. Spread knowledge

NOTE TO SELF: Just make sure your “work” is your passion. If your work is your passion, then you are merely passionate soul.

We must never take our health for granted.

Since I finished the 30-day challenge a lot has changed in my life. Weird because it’s only been a week and a half since I last wrote!

I got a phone call last Thursday, my Mother was letting me know she was getting surgery for a tumor that had metastasized in her sacral area. It was the size of a grapefruit, and when I found out I had a feeling that everything would be okay. My heart silently dropped for her as I knew she would be missing out on an epic ski season. My earliest memories of Mom pushing me down the driveway on my plastic skii’s on whiteout days, or her dragging my sister and I down black diamonds. When I think of adventure sports and snow, it’s synonymous with my Mothers love.

When she came out of surgery the growth was malignant and Jo-Mama was fine only in a lot of pain. A week later I am with some friends doing yoga and when re-injured an old meniscus tear into what is believed to be a bootstrap tear. I drove myself 7 hours from LA to the East Bay, where my Dad took care of me and drove me back to San Fran (seriously, so thankful for my Dad, has always been my best friend, though he is rapidly aging – more on that later). A little while after I went to the Dr. who prescribed an MRI, on my way back home I decided to check on Mother. I could hear the waver in her voice, I asked her how she was, she said “Not good”. She humbly explained that her wounds hadn’t healed and that she had diverticulitis. I broke down (which isn’t usual, only when it’s my Mom or Dad). I couldn’t believe it, the women who has defied most Dr.’s odds & despite knee & other surgeries has never missed a ski season EVER.

We grappled on the phone together & just as she had said when I called her frantically with my knee injury she said, “that’s why we always need to be thankful for our health & never take it for granted”. I know I was abusing my health & over working myself, my Mother, I can’t say she was taking her health for granted but living to the words she was preaching to me.

So as I prepare for potential surgery in the next few weeks I reflect on how I can better live a life of active balance & so I shall!

Bringing consciousness of good health in all the wrong ways

Since I finished the 30-day challenge a lot has changed in my life. Weird because it’s only been a week and a half since I last wrote!

I got a phone call last Thursday, my Mother was letting me know she was getting surgery for a tumor that had metastasized in her sacral area. It was the size of a grapefruit, and when I found out I had a feeling that everything would be okay. My heart silently dropped for her as I knew she would be missing out on an epic ski season. My earliest memories of Mom pushing me down the driveway on my plastic ski’s on whiteout days, or her dragging my sister and I down black diamonds. When I think of adventure sports and snow, it’s synonymous with my Mothers love.

When she came out of surgery the growth was malignant and Jo-Mama was fine only in a lot of pain. A week later I am with some friends doing yoga and when re-injured an old meniscus tear into what is believed to be a bootstrap tear. I drove myself 7 hours from LA to the East Bay, where my Dad took care of me and drove me back to San Fran (seriously, so thankful for my Dad, has always been my best friend, though he is rapidly aging – more on that later). A little while after I went to the Dr. who prescribed an MRI, on my way back home I decided to check on Mother. I could hear the waver in her voice, I asked her how she was, she said “Not good”. She humbly explained that her wounds hadn’t healed and that she had diverticulitis. I broke down (which isn’t usual, only when it’s my Mom or Dad). I couldn’t believe it, the women who has defied most Dr.’s odds & despite knee & other surgeries has never missed a ski season EVER.

We grappled on the phone together & just as she had said when I called her frantically with my knee injury she said, “that’s why we always need to be thankful for our health & never take it for granted”. I know I was abusing my health & over working myself, my Mother, I can’t say she was taking her health for granted but living to the words she was preaching to me.

So as I prepare for potential surgery in the next few weeks I reflect on how I can better live a life of active balance & so I shall!